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"Why She's So Cranky," it's not...

Friday, April 11, 2008
PS. Kristen Bell is not cranky. Also not Maggie Gyllenhaal.
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"Why She's So Cranky" clue

http://www.laineygossip.com/Selma_Blair_at_Chanel_Nuit_de_Diamants_event_New_York.aspx

Once upon a time, Selma Blair stopped eating – she was Nicole Richie before Nicole Richie. This year, Selma Blair quietly went to rehab. It apparently IS possible to go to rehab without fanfare.

Almost 12 months later, and as you can see, Selma Blair looks amazing.

Here she is last night at the Chanel Nuit de Diamants event in New York showing off a lean but healthy figure and one of the best short hair faces in the business.

Selma can be seen in My Mom’s New Boyfriend next month starring Antonio Banderas and Meg Ryan due out February 22.

Thursday, January 17, 2008 at 10:21 AM

http://www.laineygossip.com/Selma_Blair_Marc_Jacobs_show_New_York_fashion_week.aspx

What’s the difference between Selma Blair, Eva Mendes, and my Kiki compared to Lindsay Lohan and Paris and Britney and even Kiefer Sutherland…?

Selma, Eva, and Kiki went to rehab without first getting behind the wheel and trying to kill people. They went to rehab quietly, without mounting public pressure, and not as part of a public relations strategy to regain public and professional support. It’s all about motivation, non?

Selma’s stay occurred about a year ago. By all accounts, she has managed to stay clean. And she certainly looks healthier than she has in a long time. Healthy, thin, but not starving, and very chic with a severe fringe in sparkly black. Love.

Sunday, February 10, 2008 at 11:48 PM

Why She's So Cranky
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http://www.laineygossip.com/Patrick_Dempsey_Brad_Pitt_Shiloh_Jolie_Pitt_Patrick_Dempsey_Healthy_Ego_or_Egomaniacal.aspx

On the cover of Details this month – a rather candid interview in which he discusses his re-ascent and his future.

As you know, I’m not a huge fan. Not that I particularly dislike him (those sentiments are reserved for the stone-faced wife), I just don’t particularly care. There’s no swooning, there’s no shit-losing, and there’s definitely no panty ripping …unlike my eTalk producer Jennifer who has plastered his face all over her desk.

But I digress.

The point is, when it comes to Patrick Dempsey – take it or leave it – I’m rather indifferent.

Having said that, there is one quality I appreciate very much. And no, not the hair. Patrick you see has a bit of Angelina in him. He COULD give a canned interview but oftentimes he doesn’t. Instead, he seems to prefer to answer honestly, without much of a censor, and like Jolie before him, the results are at once insightful, intriguing, perhaps controversial, and possibly detrimental.

Or not.

Key quotes from the article suggest a very positive attitude and quite a robust ego, especially for someone whose rise from the dead is barely 12 months old. Note the highlighted section:

“Things are going well, but I’m not satisfied. I don’t think the character is going to change that much. Shonda Rhimes has created a great show. And I’m contributing to that and have benefited from that profoundly. And she’s benefited by being smart enough to cast me when no one else did. It’s been a great opportunity, but it’s not the end-all, be-all of where I want to go.”

Don’t begrudge him about seeing beyond Grey’s Anatomy, but Shonda “being smart enough” to give him a job? Coulda been phrased differently, don’t you think? Suggestion:

“Shonda created a great show, I am grateful that she saw something in me and made me part of it when I had limited opportunities. I would like to believe that I’ve honoured her confidence by making a great impact.”

Bit more humble, non?

Then again, humility wasn’t entirely absent. Patrick goes on to say:

“It has given me so much confidence. I went through five years where I didn’t get anything from auditions. You start to think, Well, I’m not attractive, I’m not a good actor. But I never gave up. I just accepted this is who I am. I’m not George Clooney, I’m not Brad Pitt, but I’m uniquely who I am.”

And in spite of the chubby ego comments above, THAT is what I admire. Patrick KNOWS he ain’t George, it sounds like he KNOWS he’s found his level, is comfortable inside that box, and will not reach beyond his station.

Quite a refreshing change from the delusional tv girls and boys constantly pining for Oscar gold.

Pray Goddess Dr McDreamy does not become Rachel Green.

[Bold is Lainey's, not mine]

Friday, January 12, 2007
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Thursday, April 10, 2008
PPS. Christina Ricci is not cranky.
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Thursday, April 10, 2008
PS. Natalie Portman is not taking coke for the pain.
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http://www.laineygossip.com/Jennifer_Love_Hewitt_The_Daily_Overdressed_Jennifer_Love_Hewitt.aspx

Love, as she calls herself, was at an industry party the other day where most people showed up in cocktail dresses. But to make up for the fact that nobody wanted her at the Globes, Jennifer Love Hewitt decided to strap herself into a ballgown and try to steal the show. The good news is the girl is getting uglier and uglier every time I see her. What was once cute has rapidly turned into a rather witchy looking, very old, very tired, very hard face. My mother calls this a Payback Face - a face that bears the remnants of every selfish decision and every wronged other. Karma is indeed a bitch... non?

Friday, January 20, 2006
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http://www.laineygossip.com/Jennifer_Love_Hewitt_Eric_Dane_Worst_try_hard_Jennifer_Love_Hewitt.aspx

Can you believe someone actually let her star in yet another tv show? What the F&CK??? And for the love of Givenchy – could she give up the cheap Audrey Hepburn imitation already??? No one is buying the sweet exterior or the fake smile anymore. As for finding post-teen success…suffice to say, JLH ain’t no Claire Danes.

Sunday, September 18, 2005
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http://www.laineygossip.com/Jennifer_Love_Hewitt_From_Katie_D_Jennifer_Love_Hewitt_is_a_New_Low.aspx

This is going back a while, and maybe I should be a little ashamed that I am thinking about blind items from 2 months ago when I'm supposed to be hard at work (pah!), but still wondering about 'A new low'! Help! If I remember correctly, JLH has been known to have a thing for married men. Could it be her? Would someone ever be the subject of two different blind items? Please throw me a bone over here! My friends and I won't sleep a wink until we figure this one out.

Dear Katie:

A worthy guess. But not JLH. Although I, like everyone else in the gossiping universe, am surprised to all f*cking hell about her success on that ghost talking show, the subject of A New Low is beyond tv. And, to my knowledge, has never had to dawdle below celluloid.

Wednesday, January 04, 2006
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http://www.laineygossip.com/Patrick_Dempseys_hair_in_New_York_to_promote_Enchanted.aspx

Patrick Dempsey in NYC yesterday promoting Enchanted which is the feel good, sweetheart holiday movie of the year. If you’re into Chick Lit, line up now. If you’re into Disney musicals, line up now. If you love watching heroines get rescued Rossumingly by “themselves”, line up now. And of course if you’re into McDreamy and the ridiculous Grey’s Anatomy illusion of the “perfect man”, line up now.

But will Enchanted turn McDreamy into Clooney? Doubtful. He does however have better hair, even though the mop can be unruly.

First, Patrick by day looking so handsome and rather young, charming your loins with his messy windswept ‘do. Love, love, love.

Then, Patrick by night at the screening with too much product and too much contrived pouf. Not so much.

And to answer your questions yesterday about his sourfaced wife and the burden she’s borne, suffice to say during his leans years, he was open to receiving.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007 at 8:48 AM
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http://www.laineygossip.com/Dinner_on_Jen.aspx

Jennifer Aniston has completed work on the set of Travelling in Vancouver. As the production does not officially end for another 3 weeks, Jen will be missing the traditional wrap party with cast and crew.

Instead, on Saturday, my sources say she treated everyone, including Aaron Eckhart and the film’s director, to dinner at the Teahouse in Stanley Park – a lovely gesture. Heavily guarded on the way in and on the way out, Jen was apparently in great spirits and very much looking forward to returning home to LA for some time in the sun before shooting her next film Marley & Me (sob!) with Owen Wilson.

As for reports she’s been receiving flowers every day – not true, at least not in Vancouver. She plays a florist in the film… this is why, naturally, she’s been photographed with bouquets and arrangements. There is however persistent buzz about Jason Lewis, even though they’ve never been photographed together, even though it’s all been only rumour and speculation (our sustenance) so far, still the tipsters are always on the alert for his whereabouts. My smutty sense tingling… will keep you posted.

Meanwhile, all of Hollywood is bracing for the Showdown this Saturday: the annual NIght Before Oscar party. As I first reported back in January, Aniston, Pitt, and Jolie have all been listed as hosts on the invitation. Am told that Jennifer is “100% committed” and it remains to be seen whether or not Brad and Angelina will meet the challenge, though if they don’t, it will be widely interpreted as a fold. Am hoping the three of them will just put this triangle to rest already, once and for all.

That way, maybe Life & Style will go out of business…

And if Jen really does go heads up against the Pitts, at least she will have back-up. Here are Jen’s BFF’s Courteney Cox and David Arquette out for dinner the other night patiently waiting for her return. CC looks freshly “done” around the eyes, non?

Monday, February 18, 2008
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"Trailer Visits" revealed

http://laineygossip.com/Mike_Myers_to_host_MTV_Movie_Awards.aspx

Mike Myers will host the MTV Movie Awards as part of the promotional lead-up to the release of The Love Guru. No doubt, his spoof clips will be hilarious. For the viewer that is. The real question though – will they be hilarious for the people working on them? Or will they have to overcome the monumental difficulty of producing the features without actually looking at or talking to their star?

What???

But Mike is Canadian! Canadians are NEVER douchebags… right? Please. Ask anyone who worked with Avril Lavigne at the Junos this weekend and you’ll know that couldn’t be further from the truth.

Still… on the outside, Mike is as charming as they come:

"Hosting the MTV Movie Awards is like a party, but without having to do beer runs in your mom's mini van. We do beer runs in Will Smith's four-story motor home."

Interesting he chose Will Smith to write a joke about. In a motor home. Just sayin’…

Wednesday, April 09, 2008 at 8:58 AM


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http://laineygossip.com/Mike_Myers_to_host_MTV_Movie_Awards.aspx

The Unfunny Host

Mike Myers will host the MTV Movie Awards as part of the promotional lead-up to the release of The Love Guru. No doubt, his spoof clips will be hilarious. For the viewer that is. The real question though – will they be hilarious for the people working on them? Or will they have to overcome the monumental difficulty of producing the features without actually looking at or talking to their star?

What???

But Mike is Canadian! Canadians are NEVER douchebags… right? Please. Ask anyone who worked with Avril Lavigne at the Junos this weekend and you’ll know that couldn’t be further from the truth.

Still… on the outside, Mike is as charming as they come:

"Hosting the MTV Movie Awards is like a party, but without having to do beer runs in your mom's mini van. We do beer runs in Will Smith's four-story motor home."

Interesting he chose Will Smith to write a joke about. In a motor home. Just sayin’…

Wednesday, April 09, 2008 at 8:58 AM


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Wednesday, April 9, 2008
PPPS. Miss Cranky is not Sandra Bullock. Or Scarlett Johansson. Or Reese Witherspoon. But that’s close…sort of.
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Wednesday, April 9, 2008
PPS. The GMD is not holding down his Robobride.
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"Which little Punk Ass..." revealed

http://laineygossip.com/Matt_and_Nat_the_exclusive_eTalk_Giveaway.aspx

As always, my swag is your swag. After all, I wouldn’t be getting the swag if you weren’t reading my smut.

There’s more coming from Juno Weekend but this is the first. And you can’t get it anywhere else.

The eTalk Lounge brought to you by Euphoria Calvin Klein (what’s up Marie?!?!) was hopping on Sunday night during the Junos. Every artist popped in for a visit, except for that ungrateful little sh*t Avril Lavigne, and at one point, Jully Black, Russell Peters, Feist, and Michael Buble were all piled up on our couch with Ben and TK.

They all also walked away with some pretty sweet gear. And it could all belong to one of you too.

The eTalk giveaway includes:

- this adorable Matt & Nat bag
- 50 ml bottle of Euphoria Calvin Klein
- Cargo Blu_Ray high definition blush
- Cargo lipstick, the shade is “eTalk” which is NOT available for sale and is the kind of colour that looks good on EVERYONE.

Interested? If so, send an email to inquiries@laineygossip.com with MATT & NAT as the title. Entries must be received by April 15th. Good luck!

Tuesday, April 08, 2008 at 1:18 PM
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http://laineygossip.com/Michael_Buble_at_the_Junos_2008.aspx

Still not enough to make me quiver but at least now I “get” it. Why some of you have him listed at #1 on your Freebie Five. I can understand, I can understand in my head, but not in my loins. Because even though his proclivities are certainly suspect, absolutely “the Bube” had a certain charm.
Met him on Sunday on the carpet at the Junos and interviewed him briefly. As we showed on eTalk.ctv.ca last night, he told me he was going commando. Like totally unprompted. The Bube is kinda unpredictable that way. Things just fly out of his mouth, things intended to be funny, and sometimes they are funny, and sometimes they come out totally wrong.

Anyway, he looks great. The best he’s ever looked. All the girls on our team were gushing, especially my producer Lara who loves him unabashedly even though I told her she was out of her mind. He has slimmed down though. And he looked great in his suit. And his hair, I liked his hair. But the Bube is on the wee side. Not tall at all. Barely taller than me. I’m 5 ft 3, I was wearing 3 inch heels, and we were practically shoulder to shoulder to shoulder. So probably 5 ft 8 max.

Still, as mentioned, Michael Buble is terribly charming. And lovely to the little people. But for his women issues, he really is a nice guy. He came to the Junos not expecting to win at all. He knew and was quite honest about the fact that Feist would crush him. But he graciously attended because the Junos are important to him. More important than the Grammys. Because the Junos are home. And The Bube loves home. When he took home the Fan Choice award he was genuinely thrilled and genuinely excited. Because for Michael, being embraced by Canadians is truly a super honour. Tell that to Avril Lavigne. More on her later.

So the Bube loves home and the Bube also loves boobs.

We hit up the Warner party on Saturday night. They had the best gift bag which one of YOU will be receiving. Michael was in the VIP section separated from the riffraff (us) by glass doors. Meaning we couldn’t get in but we could look in. Anyone could look in. And when we looked in he was sitting on a chair, with an attractive woman standing next to him, he had his arm around her waist, and she was leaning into his head, and his head was rubbing into her tits. Like rubbing. Like buried. And he was smiling widely and they were laughing and I’m just saying, if that were my husband or boyfriend, I would have been cutting that bitch. That’s all.

Tuesday, April 08, 2008 at 12:32 PM
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http://laineygossip.com/Which_little_Punk_Ass.aspx

Was smiley smiley when the cameras were rolling this weekend and sweet as pie in public, with a baby doll voice to match a cute baby doll dress but was an ungrateful little bitch behind the scenes at an awards show?

She turned up at sound check and immediately asked “when can I leave?” Then during her rehearsal she completely screwed up the second half of her set, blaming her poor performance on the keyboards, and the piano, and every other instrument except her voice and the nonsense going on in her head.

She also required the use of a teleprompter. For her own songs!!!

During the telecast, when it became evident she would be going home empty handed, she refused to sit in the audience when her categories were presented, preferring instead to stay backstage even after her performance like a sulky baby. Or maybe she was brushing up on geography. She appears to need a few lessons these days.

Tuesday, April 08, 2008 at 12:50 PM

Update (4/8/08):
clue
reveal

Other Punk Ass incidents
Punk Ass Cheap



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http://laineygossip.com/Michael_Buble_at_the_Junos_2008.aspx

Still not enough to make me quiver but at least now I “get” it. Why some of you have him listed at #1 on your Freebie Five. I can understand, I can understand in my head, but not in my loins. Because even though his proclivities are certainly suspect, absolutely “the Bube” had a certain charm.
Met him on Sunday on the carpet at the Junos and interviewed him briefly. As we showed on eTalk.ctv.ca last night, he told me he was going commando. Like totally unprompted. The Bube is kinda unpredictable that way. Things just fly out of his mouth, things intended to be funny, and sometimes they are funny, and sometimes they come out totally wrong.

Anyway, he looks great. The best he’s ever looked. All the girls on our team were gushing, especially my producer Lara who loves him unabashedly even though I told her she was out of her mind. He has slimmed down though. And he looked great in his suit. And his hair, I liked his hair. But the Bube is on the wee side. Not tall at all. Barely taller than me. I’m 5 ft 3, I was wearing 3 inch heels, and we were practically shoulder to shoulder to shoulder. So probably 5 ft 8 max.

Still, as mentioned, Michael Buble is terribly charming. And lovely to the little people. But for his women issues, he really is a nice guy. He came to the Junos not expecting to win at all. He knew and was quite honest about the fact that Feist would crush him. But he graciously attended because the Junos are important to him. More important than the Grammys. Because the Junos are home. And The Bube loves home. When he took home the Fan Choice award he was genuinely thrilled and genuinely excited. Because for Michael, being embraced by Canadians is truly a super honour. Tell that to Avril Lavigne. More on her later.

So the Bube loves home and the Bube also loves boobs.

We hit up the Warner party on Saturday night. They had the best gift bag which one of YOU will be receiving. Michael was in the VIP section separated from the riffraff (us) by glass doors. Meaning we couldn’t get in but we could look in. Anyone could look in. And when we looked in he was sitting on a chair, with an attractive woman standing next to him, he had his arm around her waist, and she was leaning into his head, and his head was rubbing into her tits. Like rubbing. Like buried. And he was smiling widely and they were laughing and I’m just saying, if that were my husband or boyfriend, I would have been cutting that bitch. That’s all.

Tuesday, April 08, 2008 at 12:32 PM
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Tuesday, April 8, 2008
PS. Kate Beckinsale is not cranky. Also not Katherine Heigl. And not Jennifer Aniston either.
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"Why She's So Cranky," it's not...

Monday, April 7, 2008
PS. Kate Bosworth is not cranky. Neither is Renee Zellweger.
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